How long sex should last is a subjective matter. However, according to the men’s health service Pilot, men typically engage in sex for five and a half minutes, although most believe that sex should last twice as long.
This perception might be explained by the consumption of pornography: 33 percent of men consume pornographic content at least once a week, if not more.
This gap between expectations and reality can lead men to feel inadequate in bed.
«Pornography, especially in the absence of sufficient sexual education, perpetuates unrealistic and unhealthy expectations regarding sex and intimate relationships,» said Dr. Ben Condon. «It unwarrantedly increases feelings of shame and anxiety and encourages unhealthy, and sometimes disrespectful, relationships.»
The publication presents staggering statistics: 59 percent of men believe that porn either positively influences or does not affect their sexual activity, but 33 percent of women have a different opinion on how porn affects their partner’s sexuality.
Men believe that by mimicking actions shown in pornography, they will bring pleasure to their partners. Condon mentioned that usually, porn and self-pleasure are linked, so it’s understandable that men associate this with positive feelings.
However, porn can create unrealistic expectations for both men and women, normalize aggressive behavior towards women, reduce arousal, and some studies suggest it’s associated with erectile dysfunction.
«In essence, porn is not an indicator of healthy sexual relationships. It perpetuates unrealistic expectations regarding performance, body image, normalizes aggression, extreme behavior, and, in some cases, violence, all while minimizing the need for consent. Over time, this ultimately influences our perception of healthy sexual relationships and can lead to decreased arousal, anxiety, and erectile dysfunction.»
Condon mentioned that limiting pornography consumption would be ideal from an academic standpoint, but in reality, it’s incredibly challenging due to its widespread availability.
«The results make it clear that there are still many taboos to overcome when it comes to men’s intimate health and relationships, and that’s precisely what Pilot is working on,» he said.