Rules of a Cat’s Life

All food in the house is considered to be the property of the cat. Whether it’s regular cat food or something unexpected, if it’s in the house, it belongs to the cat. This, and this too – all are the cat’s.

Also, any place in the house automatically becomes the cat’s spot. From a cozy nook by the window to the highest shelf – it’s all the cat’s territory.

Also, all objects are considered the cat’s possessions. Whether it’s toys, clothes, or even your belongings, if they are within its line of sight, they belong to the cat.

Simple rule: everything is the cat’s.

If the cat is not visible for a long time, it means it’s not there. And it’s not somewhere there, and not over there. If the cat is not there, then it simply isn’t.

If the cat is hiding somewhere, it means it can’t be seen. Not just the cat itself, but also its tail, which also becomes invisible. Especially if it turns out to be someone else’s tail.

New curtains? That’s just a challenge for the cat, and you’re a fool.

New sofa? Obviously, it’s the perfect spot for precise fool calculation.

New box? Well done if you managed to attract attention. Smart. But now step aside, it’s the cat. Leave the package with your attention too.

Eat your own mice, the cat will always prefer its own food.

The cat wears its leash by itself, without your help.

Avoid loud noises when the cat is around. It won’t approve.

Put away the broom because cats don’t like mess.

It’s better to spray yourself in the face than think the cat won’t notice.

If there’s something tasty, it’s best to offer it to the cat right away. Before it starts demanding.

Cat – good.

Cat – beautiful.

Cat – clever.

The cat doesn’t know what ‘Five in the morning’ means.

And doesn’t want to find out.

Don’t try to escape from the cat. It won’t allow it.

If you’re going somewhere, be sure to bring food. For the cat.

And even beyond that door, bring food too. For the cat.

Just bring the cat some food.

Everyone is forbidden. Except the cat.

The cat didn’t see, didn’t touch, and didn’t take.

It’s all the cat.